All my Characters are belong to…well me

•January 20, 2011 • Leave a Comment

My New Characters!

Ranger Aliutr

Claire Dentaar


The Return

•January 20, 2011 • Leave a Comment

And so I decide it’s time to resurrect this short lived project of mine, mainly because I’m bored, so don’t expect any literary genius spouting from me.

Today was mine and Eric’s scheduled return to EVE, probably not the best move as we are half way through some serious business exams but still I miss it. On the deactivation of my account I had just got out of the wormhole we’d spent a lot of time in, and I was 55 jumps from Villore in my WH fitted Loki. I had plenty of time to kill and I was in the familiar grounds of Aeschee before not too long, after somehow managing to avoid 2x Hurricanes and a Vagabond on the way after I semi-afk’d into their little setup.

For no real reason I suddenly got a bit panicky about how Old Man Star would be, but based on the fact that local in the surrounding systems was all but empty I proceeded onwards and BOOM!, a nice big camp in Aeschee…I did my best to burn back to the gate and overheat everything but I went pop about 300m from the jump point. A nice welcome back from EVE on my first night 🙂 But I was determined not to be too bothered about it, and I guess I got back to Villore that little bit quicker.

Now, however, comes my real dilemma, what to replace the Loki with. I have no real ships around, and I want to get into something that will enable me to run some missions in Villore quickly, and still have some vague cool factor. I first thought of a Cynabal, but a quick check of their prices versus my current wallet showed I’m going to need a few more millions before I can afford one of them. Next my train of thought took me to an Omen Navy Issue. It looks sweet and is a very nice ship, but I haven’t trained Amarr at all yet, and I couldn’t shut up the voice in my head that reminded me there was no need for something with that kind of price tag at the moment.

In other news I got to play around with the new Carbon Character Creator which I think is really cool, I didn’t think to screen shot as I was making both of my characters, but here are Ranger Aliutr and Claire Dentaar, I still need to add Logan at some other point. While I was writing this I got invited to the Miss EVE 2011 competition for best Female Avatar, as have a ton of other people, so I thought that was pretty funny! 🙂

Rest In Pieces

IQ 001: Guest Post!

•September 9, 2010 • Leave a Comment

The first in what is hopefully a series of guest posts. This is from IQ, our resident beacon of RPT’ing (Role-Playing Trolling) brightness in the void of space… This stuff is pretty much a drug to him, so without further ado:


IQ 001 > attention all miners and 2F holders
IQ 001 > we are pleased to announce the introduction of the SCS
IQ 001 > Ship Repatriation Scheme, open to 2F holders only

Matthias171 > is IQ 001 on?
Matthias171 > hey there nice exemption form
Matthias171 > that took some thought

IQ 001 > remember, we want ur real-life spaceship details
IQ 001 > no point in giving us fake ones…

This is where the carebear gets carebearishly stoopid
SMO30SCO > please explain real life
IQ 001 > the spaceship u fly in real life

Someone gets its…
Matthias171 > did you want my pos password so you can inspect it too?
IQ 001 > only if ur POS is in the congestions zone

Someone else doesn’t….
SMO30SCO > cool in real life I don’t fly so I’m exempt that’s brill, but you are asking for my real life personal details which as I have said before is against the user agreement and is ban-able
IQ 001 > congestion zone = kairtanne

I try to let him know I’m role playing
IQ 001 > user agreement?

Someone else still gets it and plays along
Matthias171 > idk it might be. here ill contract over all my ships and stuff you so you can inspect it

IQ 001 > i never signed no user agreement with concord
SMO30SCO > eve user agreement, the agreement that allows you to play this game
IQ 001 > i do have 1 with the Sch 5 gov though, and they have only 1 article
IQ 001 > no illegal mining
SMO30SCO > if you did not sign (by way of a tick) you must have hacked it….. keep
SMO30SCO > I may petition against you but if that fails I have to think about taking
real life legal action against you…. as what you are asking depending on the country of residence is illegal
IQ 001 > ur an idiot
Matthias171 > lol
IQ 001 > i want ur real life SPACE SHIP name

He still didn’t get it, how here comes the lulz!
SMO30SCO > thats deformation of character and published on the internet and also illegal and I can now sue you for your pennies……
Matthias171 > you mean defamation?
SMO30SCO > yeah soz, was busy phoning my lawyer and mistyped
IQ 001 > lawl

IQ 001 > im blogging this

And the lulz get better…
SMO30SCO > I do not wish any of my in game messages copied and published on the
internet, you do not have my permission for that.
IQ 001 > yeah i do
SMO30SCO > No you do not.
IQ 001 > yes i do
IQ 001 > im gona make u FAMOUS! (sorry IQ, no-one reads this)
SMO30SCO > No you do not.
IQ 001 > yes, yes i do
SMO30SCO > do not.
IQ 001 > yes i do

Myhilista > lol
Myhilista > just read the whole argument…. lol

Gotta check see what our finest Scheenins lawyers say…
IQ 001 > i just checked with our lawyers, they said hes acting illegally
IQ 001 > and must be punished
IQ 001 > but they only allow for a bounty of .5isks to be placed on his hulk….

Mazzie is from Scheenins 2 (illegal government there as far PANIC and Scheenins 5 are concerned)
Mazzic Karde > stfu IQ 😀

At this time i remind all Scheenins residents that non holders that they will be fined for no compliance to local laws and their ships repatriated
SMO30SCO > can I be one of those missioners please IQ i’d like to see you try

So there were go.

SMO30SCO is now bountied.
500,000,000 if u collect the KM of him in a nice old mission in a nice old faction ship.

Contact me, mkay?

So IQ, there are your exciting few words of internet fame, I hope you enjoy them. In other news, our original pirate/pizza-eating machine yoyo has returned, who is apparently upset with his lack of a mention…

To grief or not to grief

•August 30, 2010 • Leave a Comment

Welcome to the twentieth installment of the EVE Blog Banter, the monthly EVE Online blogging extravaganza created by CrazyKinux. The EVE Blog Banter involves an enthusiastic group of gaming bloggers, a common topic within the realm of EVE Online, and a week to post articles pertaining to the said topic. The resulting articles can either be short or quite extensive, either funny or dead serious, but are always a great fun to read! Any questions about the EVE Blog Banter should be directed to Check out other EVE Blog Banter articles at the bottom of this post!

With the recent completion of the 3rd installment of the Hulkageddon last month, @CyberinEVE, author of Hands Off, My Loots!, asks: ”Griefing is a very big part of EVE.  Ninja Salvaging, Suicide Ganking, Trolling, and  Scamming are all a very large part of the game.  What do you think about all these things?  You can talk about one, or all…but just let us know your overall opinion on Griefing, and any recommendations you may have to change it if you think it’s needed.”

Like many of the responses to the latest blog banter, the first question I had to answer was “what exactly constitutes griefing?” What we do at PANIC is certainly not your usual suicide ganking, and we don’t do it solely to cause tears from other players, funny though they are. Instead we do it to do something different, for fun, and for that healthy bit of smacktalk IQ likes to get involved with. Our, arguably, infamous forms are pretty funny to invent, and it’s funny to read some of the responses we get.

My own title in the corporation, and it’s something I like to stick to, is “the nice one.” I pvp, and you will see my sec status isn’t exactly great, but I don’t consider myself a pirate. I occasionally lurk the help channel on occasion, and being a self confessed evehq-warrior I usually have a template fit if someone asks for one in our channels, even though its usually poor…

It is this that makes me believe that there are actually very few griefers in EVE. That is, people that actually play the game to ruin someones day. Many of us may inadvertently do this while looking for some fun, but I know I speak for many when I say it’s not uncommon for me to have a nice chat with someone I’ve just killed, or been killed by. Part of the allure of EVE is that it is truely persistant, and your mistakes count for a lot. If someone is scammed from their ISK or assets, they probably are not going to see them again any time soon. A bit of common sense goes a long way, though a fellow blogger once said it seems that all common sense is left at the door when someone logs in to EVE, and that probably more true than it should be in my case.

In this cold and unforgiving universe , we’re not all cut throat inhumane monsters, despite what we may want you to believe… Although there are those sitting at their computers like this, I wouldn’t consider it griefing.


PANIC Celebrities

•August 30, 2010 • Leave a Comment

So PANIC appear to be becoming more and more widely known in the Scheenins area. Upon undocking from the Roden shipyards station in system you will be greeted by the following messages from one of our ‘fans’:

According to IQ, this was not an alt of a war target, but apparently a less than impressed independent miner he upset. Regardless, I would have dropped my own can to correct that grammatical mistake, but unfortunately there were none in system and I was too lazy to go buy one from somewhere else.

In other places I received a cool 25 million ISK for the Corp from someone who just asked us to carry on doing what we doing. Shows that some people do see the funny side of what we get up to…

EDIT: Excuse the terrible pictures…

The Fresh Prince of Scheenins

•August 23, 2010 • Leave a Comment

Just a short post that I had to share. Cruising around for some wartargets when I noticed this guy’s bio. I thought it was pretty funny and then I saw it mentioned us!! Anyway thanks Blasum for the honourable mention 🙂

Now, this is the story all about how,
My life and cans got flipped-turned upside down
And I’d like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I’ll tell you how I became the prince of a system call Scheenins

In west low sec born and raised
in the asteriod belts was where I spent most of my days
minin’ out maxin’ jetcanning’ all cool
And all mining some valspar outside of concord
When a couple of panic guys
Who were up to no good
Startin making trouble in my system
I got in one little battle and my corp got scared
They said ‘You’re movin’ with your corp mates and slyce in Scheenins’

Well i I whistled for a shuttle and when it came near
The concord plate said “Fresh” and it had implants in the mirror
If anything I can say is that this shuttle was rare
But I thought ‘Man forget it’ – ‘Yo home to Scheenins’

I pulled up to the station about seven or eight
And I yelled to the shuttle ‘Yo Caldari smell ya later’
I looked to my Roden Station, I was finally there
To sit on my throne as the prince of Scheenins.

Obvious trap not so obvious…

•August 21, 2010 • 2 Comments

So there I am, spinning my shiny new jaguar in station, as per usual, when Eric mentions in Corp I should come and bait some mining barges, having nothing better to do, and an interesting ability to miss all the action, I undocked straight away.

The usual cries and attempted hate against P.A.N.I.C’s forms came in while I was on-route:

Supream Ruler > state your buisness
SKINNYERIC1 > stopping people jet can mining without necessary paperwork
Supream Ruler > you took his stuff
SKINNYERIC1 > it was illegally mined ore
Supream Ruler > how?
SKINNYERIC1 > has he filled in a 2F form? no
Supream Ruler > 2f
Supream Ruler > that not real
SKINNYERIC1 > its pretty real. I just stole from him because he failed to fill it in
Supream Ruler > who runs the 2f?

7 jumps later and I land in the belt, Supream Ruler and Pentiumjul in a Comrorant and Retriever respectively. At this point Eric realised im not paying attention and shouts something along the lines of GTFO OUT THE BELT BEFORE THEY SEE US TOGETHER. So I start aligning out, and as my warp drive spins up, I get a convo invite from Supream. What he said then starts a good 10 mins of hilarity.

Supream Ruler > want to help me kill someone
Ranger Aliutr > why not ive been spinning in station for like 5 hours
Supream Ruler > ok then
Supream Ruler > he has a nemesis
Ranger Aliutr > let me guess
Ranger Aliutr > skinnyeric1
Supream Ruler > yup :Dhe will die
Supream Ruler > i gots the warp jammer
Ranger Aliutr > ok
Ranger Aliutr > is he stealing from you?
Supream Ruler > u got a better ship than him?
Ranger Aliutr > yeah assualt frig
Supream Ruler > from my freind and me
Ranger Aliutr > i can take a sb easy
Ranger Aliutr > ill fleet you
Supream Ruler > ok then

The fact that alarm bells wern’t ringing when I guessed the cloaked Nemesis I hadn’t even seen was Eric still amazes me. The problem now was trying to get both the Comorant and the Retriever to do something that would allow me to shoot them. We came up with confusing them with agression mechanics, and amazingly they happily took my 1 unit of ammo each, and promptly went red, thinking that would mean we could all shoot this pesky stealth bomber.

With that we wasted no time in scrambling and killing both of them, first the Cormorant then the Retriever.

Suddenly came the realisation:

Supream Ruler > u screw bag
Ranger Aliutr > seriously im so suprised you didnt realise we’re in the same corp
Supream Ruler > well i was gonna pay u
Supream Ruler > u didnt have to kill me
Supream Ruler > u couldve said no im not gonna help u
Supream Ruler > i didnt even do anything wrong

Oh but you did Supream, believe me. A 2-F was handed to the miner, and we recieved the usual war-dec threats. We got talking to them, and for some reason Supream decided to come back and loot from his wreck. Bad idea as we were still lurking the belt, and pop goes his Badger. Pentium then returned in a Catalyst that was also promptly destroyed, as was the Velator he undocked in next.

Of course this all just proves the big, big unofficial EVE rule, don’t be so trusting with people you’ve never met, and check pilot’s infos before you hire them to kill their friends…